Your child’s teacher has made it plain: she’s not ready to move to
first grade next fall and needs another year of kindergarten. What now?
Probably you’ve been expecting this. You might have noticed that
your child isn’t doing well and that she’s not performing at the same level as
other kids in the class. If you haven’t – if the decision to hold her back a
year comes as a surprise – then now is the time to ask some questions, in a
nice way:
- What seems to be the problem?
- What did the teacher do this year to help?
- What will be done differently next year to move your child ahead?
It’s important that you remain calm. Getting all worked up doesn’t
solve anything. You need more information and to get that, you have to ask
questions and then listen – really listen – to the answers.
You need to know if the issue for your child is simply one of
maturation, so that another year of the same sort of instruction is all that’s
needed. But you also need to know if the issue for your child is something more
complicated, so the solution might include more intensive remediation.
The answers you get will show you what you should do next.
If the teacher can tell you what sorts of difficulty your child
has had and why, and if she seems to have a clear plan for getting your child
on track next year, and if what she says makes sense to you, then probably
things are in good hands.
If the teacher seems fuzzy about the disconnect between your child
and the expected level of achievement, and can’t really say clearly what the
problem might be or why another year in kindergarten might help, or if she
blames your child, or you, or the curriculum, or the principal, or the size of
her class this year, then it might be time to find another school. What you are looking for is professionalism.
Your child’s teacher should be the expert. She should sound like she knows what
she’s doing and takes responsibility for children’s success.
The kindergarten year is more important these days than it ever
was. A good start in kindergarten reading, math and organizational skills sets
the stage for success throughout elementary school and beyond. Kindergarten
used to be optional. It no longer is. So if your child struggled in
kindergarten this year, then making another try at it next year is probably a
good idea, in the same school or a better one.
Being held back a year in kindergarten has fewer negative effects
for children’s self-esteem and social skills than does being held back in any
other grade. If a repeat will be needed, kindergarten is the time to do it.
Which brings us to the prospect of repeating a year in a higher
grade. If you’re being told that your older child needs a repeat, then there is
cause for concern. Certainly you want your child to be successful in school.
You don’t want him to continue to fail, year after year. But being held back is
a blow to just about every kid. The shame and embarrassment some children feel
in being retained in grade can poison school for them. Even though they may
benefit in theory from another year, in actuality they may never recover from
the experience of retention itself.
For an older child, then, the suggestion that your child should
repeat a grade should mobilize you to get outside help, in the form of tutoring
or other support. Try to arrange with his school to have another evaluation
made in the early fall, before a decision for grade placement is made for
certain. Then work hard to improve his skills in the meantime.
The possibility of repeating kindergarten – or any other grade –
is a reminder to keep on top of children’s progress in school from the very
beginning of the year. It’s easier to fix things when a problem is identified
early. That’s why your conversation with your child’s kindergarten teacher
matters so much.
© 2013, Patricia Nan Anderson. All rights reserved.
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